remember all the rituals i created? one: only ever drink coffee righthanded. (preferably on a monday, whilst wearing purple nail polish) two: only appraise your appearance in a broken mirror. (this way you have to learn to look past flaws) three: you need whimsy. (remember to keep doors unlocked, partially unscrewed: the better to usher in… Continue reading NaPoWriMo 8 (superstition)
excavations begin, mining underway. digging deep to find you in the vestiges of old memory. it's trickier than anticipated. these files should be here, somewhere, but they're hard to locate. your indignation at this slight is not necessary. perhaps you should be here somewhere - you are not. eyes faded and voice little more than… Continue reading NaPoWriMo 7 (tricky)
the further away i am the easier it is to remember. (it's together that makes forgetting so difficult)
she watches the room. it's moving slowly, barely even noticeable. sometimes she sees the mirror and each time remembering herself becomes a little more difficult.
let's freeze this moment in time and pretend we won't forget in five years. --- remembering is reduced to this: one moment trapped under plastic.
time to forget you again. i mean it this time just as i have every other time i've said it. memories slip through my grasp. they fade day by day facilitated by new hobbies and various ways to amuse myself. but after that the flood. they return unwanted and unbidden because they were only repressed… Continue reading cyclical
forgetting you is a battle. endless blue of the brightest day never grants a reprieve. paper thin control always, always allows the curse to return. for you are a curse destined to remain trapped here. all these memories are flawless and every exorcism will fail. and a girl remains locked in her forest and body.… Continue reading the curse
even in darkness so deep it seems infinite i cannot forget.
clouds sweep over blue skies. retreating indoors i retrieve paint supplies and canvas, bracing myself. one swatch, five swatches all different, it still doesn't work. a shrieking vacuum breaks focus here, stray slash of paint. music trickles into my conscious jarring me, or awakening me. reluctant to answer the door you, you're here despite logic. turn… Continue reading trials
there are days i regret. you see, i don't often regret things that already happened. this is what you do and never even realize it. throw myself into new projects hoping for respite just once. you are a compulsion though breaking down the strongest willpower. only it never quite works remembering what did happen once.… Continue reading 20-20