Passenger of a Faux Landlord

I'm driving, testing out my new car. It drives easily, a welcome change from the constant sputtering and coughing of the last one. The steering is smooth and the windows quick to move when controlled. A flash of blue catches my eye, standing out electrically against the overcast gray sky and white building nearby. The… Continue reading Passenger of a Faux Landlord

The Faux Landlords Return

It's a cold, rainy winter day. I've been indoors all day, except the five minutes it took to get to the bus. This cold snap is a shock to my system, and I find myself wishing for a scarf. As I walk up the driveway there's a definite meow to be heard. It's probably just the… Continue reading The Faux Landlords Return

A Truly Terrible Tale

Amanda cracked her gum as she watched James, her favourite minion, put the final touches on her Villain Machine of 2010. Of course, she’d only designed the thing. She was sure she could’ve built it herself, but it was important that she donate the money to others for their labour. Besides, if she had done… Continue reading A Truly Terrible Tale

Of Food and People I Sing

Once upon a time, I came to a thought. People are like food. I don't mean this in the vampire way, or cannibal. I mean you can compare people to the type of food you put on your plate. I was going to think about it according to the four food groups, but I decided… Continue reading Of Food and People I Sing

Of Sunshine and Subway

Sunlight, it's the first thing to be seen. So much sunlight, everywhere. Sunglasses a quick necessity. Seriously, prescription sunglasses are the best. Sliced bread just doesn't compare. Someone could, after all, Simply tear off pieces of bread as needed. Subway. Suitable lunch or dinner So convenient. Selecting food options for maximum delight "Salads?" The server… Continue reading Of Sunshine and Subway

Snark, Snark, Snark

For the sake of my own fun, I'm going to do a Snark Per Week, like the one I did last week on "Firework'. Was it last week? I can't remember, but it made me relax and have fun and all that good stuff. I apologize for any incorrect lyrics. This is probably a good… Continue reading Snark, Snark, Snark

Aw Crap, Not the Forklift

I finished brushing my hair and checked my lipstick. I looked businesslike and professional, an advantage in case the time machine went wrong. It was ready. For months the physics department had been secretly working on a time machine, reluctantly working with an English major in order to test the proficiency of the machine. The… Continue reading Aw Crap, Not the Forklift

Daily Prompt: The Cat Says Meow

You know, I get a pretty tough deal out of life. I am ageless, the one thing that has a life spanning centuries. Over the years I get painted and remodelled, lines fading away with wear and tear. I am the road, and this is my life. I began very humbly, a strip of stone… Continue reading Daily Prompt: The Cat Says Meow

Snark Away, Or: How Not to Use Repetition

Once upon a time, I heard "Firework" by Katy Perry. It unleashed snark deep within my soul. This is an old piece, polished up, that I wrote a while back, loaded with snark, in honour of today's Daily Prompt. I come in peace. The song starts “do you ever feel like a plastic bag”. Plastic… Continue reading Snark Away, Or: How Not to Use Repetition

What Are You On About?

I've never been a fan of the deep dark secret. I always find that in books, they tend to be revealed as pretty anti-climatic - at least, in young adult fiction. Which, I confess, I do still read. Hey, I want to be a novelist, probably for young adults - I should know what's out… Continue reading What Are You On About?